Dear Mother Maple: Tiptoe, through the…
Dear Mother Maple:
What is it with these freakin’ ukuleles everywhere? Doesn’t anyone want a full-size musical instrument anymore?
First off, dear: have you thought of moving from your regular double-double to some green tea? Now, to your point. You don’t seem to like ukeleles very much. Or perhaps it’s the trendiness of them that bothers you. And sure, they are trendy. There’s that Victoria Vox girl in the US, Manitoba Hal out east, James Hill everywhere… even that darling duo Dala seems to be afflicted!
Don’t even get me started about my young friend Mr. Newland. If blame were to be laid, I’d lay it in somewhat large proportion on him, that McNie fella in Corktown, and on that darling Chalmers Doane, God love him. When I think back to him and his ukelele orchestras in Halifax, and that time we ended up at the Midtown Tavern and … well, never mind. David Newland may be many things, but he’s no Chalmers Doane.
What I mean to say, dear, is this. Don’t be so concerned about the size of other instruments. Or, for that matter, your own. Why don’t you think a little bit more about what you can DO with what you’ve GOT? And try the green tea, dear. It can’t hurt.